RATE IT! Guacamole App-etizing!

My obsessive collecting of iPhone apps -- both useful & time-wasting -- continues at a fever pitch. Yes, I really do need to get a life it would seem!

This week I found a very silly wack-a-mole type game called Guacamole - yep, it's based on that slimy green mulch, famed co-star to nachos everywhere!

Basically, you have to tap on the screen whenever a smiley garlic, or avocado pop up, oh and the bowls of sour cream too --- that's right, we're making guacamole here!! Trouble is, there are forces at work to put a wrench into the proceedings. Namely....a scary Mexican skull of the dead, and a posse of squelchy poohs, complete with hovering flies! Every time you mistakenly smack one of them, you lose points, and your lifeline. Do it too many times and it's game over, sucker.

The game is the ultimate in juvenile silliness and that's what makes it so cute!

RATE IT! Second Helping of Hamm

Saturday cannot arrive fast enough.

The loose lips of 'Mad Men' star Rich Sommer were ... correct! Yes, "Harry Crane", you must know a little something about the ol' telly because as you promised, your co-star, Jon Hamm WILL be hosting 'Saturday Night Live' this coming weekend!

If Jon's original turn on SNL is anything to go by, his sophomore effort will be stellar & a definite must see. Funny too because NBC hasn't been "must see TV" for ages!

HATE IT! No Sal-vation

NOOOO!!!!!

Rotten TV news of the day...

Bryan Batt, who portrays 'Sal Romano' on "Mad Men" WON'T be returning for next season.

Sal's return was the one plot line missing from that incredible season finale a few months back.

What a loss. :(

RATE IT! My First Dictionary

My favourite new discovery! My First Dictionary. If only!!!

This hilarious website has been around for several years now... why, oh why did it take me so long to find it? I'm addicted to the word of the day and its twisted "explanation". The old school illustrations are the icing.

Enjoy!

RATE IT! Zoey of the Week

OOOOOHHHH NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Mr. Bill pleads for mercy.

A 10 month old Schipperke refuses to un-chomp.

OUCH! Right below the belt.

That's gotta hurt!!

Hope your day is going a lot better than Mr. Bill's!

RATE IT! Tina Fey in Vogue

Oh, hello!!! Is there another sun in the sky?

I cannot believe my eyes. 'Vogue' magazine is actually putting a woman on its cover who eats, has working brain cells and wears *shock* glasses. 'Vogue' of old would never, ever do such a thing years ago. Wonder what gives? Did Anna Wintour smack her head or something?

Tina Fey, congrats on your March cover of American 'Vogue.'

You are gorgeous and talented, and probably never dreamed of being showcased on the front of this iconic fashion publication because of their wacko standards of what beauty is all about.

Okay, twist my arm... I may just buy this issue. Yay, Tina!

RATE IT! The Ed Hardy Boyz

These two have nothing on Shaun Cassidy & Parker Stevenson!

Courtesy Funny or Die, silly & brilliant as always.

The Ed Hardy Boyz: The Case of the Missing Sick Belt Buckle from Jon Daly

The Ed Hardy Boyz 2 Trailer from Jon Daly

RATE IT! Darth Vader Toast

Burnt toast of any description isn't really my thing but if you live for all things 'Star Wars', this kitchen gadget is the best thing since sliced bread.

Back in black, the 'Darth Vader' toaster will burn his iconic image onto your breakie without fail.

How's that for shameless self-promotion?

RATE IT! Shore Thing

'Funny or Die' gives Alyssa Milano the 'Jersey Shore' treatment...'nuff said!

Alyssa Milano's Evolution: Jersey Shore from Alyssa Milano

HATE IT! Rolling Stone Diet Plan

Still struggling to lose those extra holiday pounds?

How timely!

'Rolling Stone' magazine has come to your rescue... just take a gander at this pasty, sad excuse for a media whore hogging the latest cover, and I bet you'll lose your appetite too.

RATE IT! EW Nails It

As a staunch Team Coco member, the latest 'Entertainment Weekly' cover sums up my feelings about the whole 'Tonight Show' fiasco.

Jay Leno, bombs away the #1 choice as the biggest entertainment gaffe EVER. The stinker!

Looks good on him.

RATE IT/HATE IT! Casting Continuity Faux Pas

The CW has announced that the best looking Baldwin of the bunch will be guest starring on 'Gossip Girl' as Serena's mysterious long-lost Daddy.

In theory.... GREAT! Billy Baldwin will provide some much needed man candy -- provided he hasn't gone the way of his big bro' Alec.

But not so fast.....before we get too excited about the latest addition to our favourite UES peeps, the casting of Billy is a bit off colour --- if you recall from the not-so special flashback ep last season, Serena's Dad is blonde. VERY BLONDE. Not a whisper of Sun In or anything of the like to suggest that he was just faking it as a teen.

In the scramble to cast a big poppa for Blake Lively's Serena, looks like the casting department is suffering from short term memory loss. Continuity sure isn't what it used to be!

RATE IT! Chocolate Bar Magnet

Here's some confectionary that won't spoil that New Year's resolution...

The chocolate bar magnet. Looks real, and can be broken up into smaller pieces just like the real deal.

Sweet!

RATE IT! Button Badge Art

When I find products like this one, I revert back to my inner 10 year old self. I just *love* buttons. LOVE them. I have TONS of them -- still. Just can't part with the CHUM star sign, or Mr. Kool-aid pins picked up along my travels.

It's a no-brainer that this piece would attract my attention. All poppy, colourful kiddie JOY!

I could so make this picture myself. Good to know that my Fonzie "Sit On It" pin could be of use.

RATE IT! Scrabble for Couch Spuds

Triple word score!

Made in England, and available from Rockett St. George, meet the comfy Scrabble cushions.

Take a seat and spell to your heart's (and back's) content.

RATE IT! True Gawker!

The web is saturated today with the Golden Globes good, the bad and the desperately ugly. To spare you yet another rehashing of the winners, the worst dressed actors, and the number of disses laid down on ratings-weary NBC... I'm gifting you with the most entertaining and silly GG post I could find.

Gawker.com wins the prize for their "Blurry Photos: Neil Patrick Harris scared of Mickey Rourke, Jenna Fischer in the can". Snapped by Hollywood stars and wannabees during the festivities, all for the benefit last night of Twitter -- who else!

Click through and enjoy! For me, NPH takes the cake.

(photo: Gawker.com)

RATE IT! Ricky Gets Golden

Bah!

American critics seem to be bashing Ricky Gervais for his "uninspired" (courtesy Hollywood Reporter) hosting of last night's Golden Globes awards ceremony in Hollywood.

What? Seriously???

Did everyone's sense of humour get dampened by the drizzle that plagued Tinseltown during the red carpet last night? Can't take a penis or plastic surgery joke?? Maybe Ricky was right.... the plastic surgeons did a booming biz prior to the awards -- no one could move their faces to smile, or laugh.

C'mon, people!! Drop the overly Liberal, PC act and LAUGH!!! Ricky *was* funny!!! Plugging his "Office" DVDs... that was FUNNY! The joke about stereotypes for the Irish and *then* introducing Colin Farrell ---- FUNNY!!!! The Mel Gibson-drinking joke ---- FUNNY! Geez, people!!! The best comedy is when the cotton wool is removed and the performer takes no prisoners! I think many in Hollywood and the industries that feed off it have forgotten this fact.

The jibes at actors being better than writers?? Hello!?! Ricky IS a writer AND actor! Glad to see that he has a sense of humour about his industry -- and honestly, he was kinda telling the truth. Actors do think they are better than the writers --- the very people who create the works that they perform and profit from --- actors do think they are better than pretty much everyone. The truth hurts, doesn't it.... but sometimes it's also great comedy material as Ricky proved over and over again last night.

Ricky Gervais -- "uninspired", "stale" (looking at you, Chicago Sun Times).... AS IF! Hollyweird, you don't deserve to have a hilarious Brit as your award show host. Go back to your unfunny American uber-PC hosts with their self-congratulatory smugness -- you never know.... maybe Jay Leno will be available next year. Then you'll be happy!

RATE IT! TV Colour Bars Mouse Pad

The TV industry geek has gotten the best of me yet again....

Me likey this colour bars mouse pad. All those hours spent in the control room, packaging promos and station IDs -- memories!!!

Just be thankful that this mouse mat version of the techy TV colour bars does not include tone! THAT is a good thing, trust me!

RATE IT! Eye Chart Tee

Eye tests are a bitch especially for those of us who have lived all our lives blind as a bat, but Loyal Army have put a fun spin on the proceedings with this tee.

Step off, indeed!

RATE IT! I Want You Back

I *loved* this song when I was growing up!!

"I Want You Back" by Sherry Kean, a Canadian singer with a unique look and killer voice. Sure, CanCon requirements probably helped but truth be told, this tune is fab! Shame it's not yet available for purchase off iTunes, or that her albums weren't re-issued on CD. EMI, are you listening? Probably not...but a girl can hope!

RATE IT! Zoey of the Week

In the pink!

Winter blahs? Not for this puppy! Pretty in pink, the most stylish pup on the block.

RATE IT! Where's Rob?

The Improv Everywhere gang get up to the usual hijinx -- this time at a NBA basketball game.

Too funny!

R.I.P. Gumby Dad

Art Clokey, the creator of kiddie faves Gumby, and Davey & Goliath, died in his sleep last Friday. He was 88.

Clokey's Gumby, Pokey, Prickle and Goo -- and the Groobees, and Blockheads -- were my absolute favourite characters as a little kid. I had the set of characters as a 4 year old, carried them everywhere.

I'm actually surprised that this sad news wasn't carried via more mainstream news services. I only discovered it on my iPhone this morning. Perhaps kids these days are more interested in the computer tomfoolery that's sold today as cartoon entertainment. It's a shame that animation pioneers such as Clokey seem to be forgotten by some. Much like the works of Rankin/Bass, Art Clokey's stop-motion animation is full of heart, soul and fun. High tech isn't always the best, in my humble opinion.

Rest in peace, Mr. Clokey -- and thank you.

HATE IT! Leno Limbo

After butchering their prime time drama budget to make way for Jay Leno's abysmal talk/variety show weeknights at 10pm, NBC is now rumoured to be scrambling to dump 'Chinny' back to his old 11:35 pm timeslot.

Is it any surprise that Leno's 10pm program is drowning in ratings oblivion? It's dull, he's dull -- all that audience running up to "high five" him -- SO lame, dated and irrelevant. Even his once-faithful viewers who previously were lulled to sleep by his whiney tones back in the midnight hour of old, have abandoned him...probably off watching 'The Good Wife' or some other compelling 10pm drama that NBC thought too pricey and ratings dicey to fund. Kinda funny when you think of the irony!

I don't really care what happens to Jay Leno. I *am* annoyed that in order to save this old fart, NBC are willing to drop-kick Conan O'Brien from his newly anointed 11:35 pm to a later timeslot, like the 12:35 pm spot he previously occupied. Conan IS FUNNY! Leno is not! Doesn't take a college education to figure that one out. NBC is freaking, trying to save the ratings bleed by moving Jay back to where he was once comfy & successful, but seriously.... it just won't work!!

The late night line-up shuffle from last Fall has finally settled in and found its comic groove. Conan is on a roll, and Jimmy Fallon who follows is just getting better and better. Young viewers can relate -- at last, a host who knows what time shifting and the internet are all about. Plus, his thank you notes are really funny. Can't get better than etiquette & humour wrapped up in one silly package!

Having worked in television myself for many years, I'm completely dumbfounded at how the NBC brass continue to make such costly decisions time and time again. They totally deserve the ratings hell that they are mired in - but not at the expense of Conan, Jimmy or their faithful viewers. Perhaps it would be best if Conan jumped off this shinking network ship and got the respect and timeslot he deserves some place else. Can't say that I'd blame him.

HATE IT! I Am Speechless...

Searching around Google yesterday for wedding dress images to use for my 'Last Bride Standing' post & I stumbled across THIS....

...um...pregnancy wedding gown, anyone?

Nah, didn't think so.....

No surprise that it didn't catch on...

HATE IT! Worst. TV Show. EVER!

I love crappy television -- but even *I* have to draw the line somewhere....

Yes, I have ceremoniously broken out the Crayolas and my ruler in preparation to create that line...

Stumble into the spotlight 'Last Bride Standing.' Easily the WORST reality show ever created. I'm gobsmacked that someone would green light this train wreck. IT'S SO, SO BORINGLY BAD! An infomerical would be more entertaining. Sham-Wow, anyone?

The "wacky" idea: a bunch of zealous bridezillas drunk on the dream of the ultimate wedding extravaganza compete to win $100,000 worth of wedding *stuff*, including a reception for 250 of their nearest & dearest. The would-be brides must stand with one of their hands pressed against a wall -- yep, literally -- for hours, days even --until the last bride standing triumphs & scoops up all the goodies, while her wedding gown bedazzled 'sisters' fall -- again, literally *yawn* -- by the wayside.

Hmm, kinda kooky in theory but in execution it's painfully slow and uninteresting to watch. The gals are hungry, stressed, tired and very very unwatchable. Unlike 'Big Brother' where the stresses and strains put upon people stuck in a less than ideal situation make GREAT television, 'The Last Bride Standing' is the EXACT opposite. It also proves that dimwits will do just about anything to get on telly -- including making fools of themselves, crankily whining about needing the loo while wearing the most hideous of wedding dresses. Who wants to see that? Imagine how their prospective family-in-law feels? Ugh... is it too late to call the whole thing off? Just what everyone needs... a nutter married into the family.

In all of this, I'm most surprised that SunTV in Toronto would even purchase (gosh, I hope they didn't commission!) this series! It's laughable -- and they have it scheduled right before '60 Minutes'! Not the best of lead-ins, let me tell you! No doubt I've piqued some people's interest in this fiasco - but if you do seek out a YouTube clip or tune in for the TV show proper, don't blame me about never getting that precious time back!

RATE IT! Grilled Cheese Truck

My fave comfort food of all time is on the move -- literally!!

New York magazine reports that the Brooklyn Flea is unveiling a mouthwatering batch of new food vendors... including a grilled cheese stand called the Milk Truck, AND an innovative grilled cheese truck!

How cool is that! The sandwich shop will open this month with the wheelie grilled cheese truck driving up in May or June.

Now, the cheesy sandwiches on sale here will be somewhat special...not your run of the mill made-by-Mum type of grilled cheese (white bread, Kraft cheese slices with a dollop of ketchup on the side) that many of us (ME!) know and oh, so love. Nope, the fella in charge, Keith Klein, will be peddling posh cheeses, fancy breads and pricey mustards in his grilled cheeses. Still, the idea is fantastic! Makes a change from the pretzel and hot dog carts!

RATE IT! Clipped Wings

With the holidays over, the drudgery of the ol' 9-5 routine is back into unremitting overdrive. It's easy to get depressed under piles of overdue filing, banked voice messages & meeting requests that just won't take a breather. Office life can be hell - but it doesn't *have* to be.

Take See Jane Work. Have you never visited this office supply website? You are in for a treat! Staples, or Grand & Toy, it is not! It's colourful, whimsical, a one way ticket to a more enjoyable work experience -- just waiting for your custom.

Prior to Christmas I was hired to write several holiday shopping wish lists for the fantastically addictive Slice.ca website, and I couldn't help but rave at the time about this cute yet practical Magnetic Birdie. She guards your paper clips, while adding a pleasant touch of colour & joie de vivre to your working week. Remove a clip and birdie exalts with a chirpy tune. Office supplies were never so charming, so...well, happy!

This Magnetic Birdie is just one of many office "necessities" waiting for you at See Jane Work. Check it out... it's well worth a visit even if it's just to give you a midday boost.

HATE IT! Pecan't.... Sorry!

A new year, a new decade.... welcome 20-10!

With a clean slate ahead of us, there's much to look forward to... including 12 monthly Dairy Queen Blizzard celebrations!! Whoo-hoo!

January is always a difficult slog... all that post-Christmas let-down punctuated with a flurry of bill payments, plus the chilly reality of several months of blinding cold ahead for many of us in the northern hemisphere. But still, we *still* gleefully await the unveiling of the latest Blizzard of the Month. Regardless of the frigid temps outside, it's ALWAYS Dairy Queen time! Who can say "no" to a little frosty joy in a waxy paper cup??

This month... *I* must say no. It pains me, it does. I'm saying no.... not because of some cock-eyed New Year's resolution banning treats or anything like that, but.... because the January Blizz of the Month is just plain nuts.... pecans, to be specific.

Meet the Turtle Pecan Cluster Blizzard. Caramel, chocolate and pecans. You lost me there with the nuts. So not a fan...but I'm sure many will enjoy this New Year's offering. If I was trying to be good and avoid all decadent treats, well Dairy Queen has made it easy for me this month. I just can't..... pecan't, to be precise.

Til February then...

RATE IT! Zoey of the Week

If I peek out of the curtain *very* carefully.... no one will notice me... I can see you but you can't see me.....

HATE IT! Tiger Trash

Tiger Woods strips off, not for a new mistress, but for the next issue of 'Vanity Fair' magazine.

The article examines the golfer's recent difficulties in wake of his *indiscretions*. Broke but still snappin' famous photographer, Annie Liebowitz, scored the photo shoot. Nothing like a scandal to make everyone want to cash in (looking to boost circulation, VF?!). To be fair to Annie L., she shot Woods before home-wrecker-palooza came to Tiger town.

And now the world can see some of what Tiger's 15+ mistresses (and his poor wife, Elen) were privy to...

Is it just me? I just think "ew!"

Lying, cheating trash.

RATE IT! Sir Peter Jackson!

Take a bow, New Zealand! It's refreshing to hear that the country is wasting no time in honouring native son, film director and 'Lord of the Rings' czar, Peter Jackson -- making him a "Sir"!

Queen Elizabeth is the head of state for New Zealand (like Canada) and will officially sanction this honour, and then the rest is history!

Won't Frodo and Sam be proud!!

Now if only England would do the same for a certain Ryan Giggs?

(photo: Brit Films)

RATE IT! Show Me How

I am pretty crap at most DIY tasks, and would rather pay for someone who knows implicitly what they are doing -- but there's this really nifty new book that might switch my line of thinking.

'Show Me How: 500 Things You Should Know' by Derek Fagerstrom and Lauren Smith is a helpful reference book depicting via glorious colour illustrations how easy it is to complete many important (and some wacky) tasks.

Want to brush your dog's teeth? Open a champagne bottle? Perform CPR, or breathe fire? 'Show Me How' will, well.... show you how! And in a fun way....none of that boring instructional manual blandness.

Just keep the fire department's number on speed dial in case you decide to undertake the fire breathing lesson.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Wishing all my family, friends and fabulous readers a very Happy New Year, and all the best for 2010!

With the Vancouver 2010 Olympics, Sex & the City 2, the Lord of the Rings trilogy on Blu-Ray DVD, and the World Cup in South Africa -- all arriving in 2010, it looks to be a fantastic year -- pop culture wise!